If Only by Vampgirl79

"Come over, I need you. Now." As always, I go to her. Except this time it may be the last. I love her deeply, but I don't know if I can do this anymore. Each goodbye is harder than the last one. I want more than just being hers behind closed doors. If only we could truly be together; if only we were meant to be.

The Gist

Plan and simple this is a cheating fic. Edward and Bella are each other’s true love but perhaps falling in love too young meant that it was a love that couldn’t hold as they grew into adulthood.

Edward and Bella are both in committed relationships but have been engaging in an affair together for about a year. Edward yearns to run away with Bella and start the life he was meant to live but something’s holding Bella back. 

Edward and Bella

Having fallen in love as high schoolers, Edward and Bella struggle to make their relationship work long distance once they get to college. They break up but reconnect years later (for reasons which have not fully been explained). The love Edward has for Bella is all consuming and to a point desperate as he knows that neither of them are happy with the affair but he is unable to give her up.

Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I continue setting myself up for heartbreak over and over again? I'm a fool who is madly in love that's why. I believe in us, I believe with all of my heart that we can build a future together. If only she wasn't so damn scared and he didn't have such a fucking hold on her!

Stroking her thick hair, I sigh quietly. "You're right, maybe it's not fair. But, it's also not fair to keep doing this to each other, to them. So…go away with me, Bella. Tonight. I'll help you pack some of your belongings and-"

She shakes her head and the torn expression etched on her face rips my heart in half. "Eddie, I wish I could, more than anything, but-"

"No, no excuses this time. Let's do it. We will go anywhere you desire, as long as we're together."

Bella takes a deep breath, lays her head down on my chest and I feel a single tear slip out of her eye. "Edward, stop. Please, just don't."

Gently, I cradle her face between my hands, forcing her to meet my gaze. "Bella, I love you more than my own life, more than anyone else in this world. You know that, don't you?"

She nods as more wetness releases out of her eyes and glides down her rosy cheeks. "Yes, of course I do. And I love you too."

"Then that's all that matters. Let's just quit thinking and just…do."

Why Read This?

This fic is a newbie, with only 5 chapters but it’s definitely a page turner. Or is that screen scroller? I want to know why Bella feels compelled to stay married to her husband and why she seems almost fearful of leaving him. The love between Edward and Bella is compelling and despite the fact what they’re doing is wrong, you still root for them to figure out their lives so they can be together as they are supposed to. 

Will Edward realise his dream? Most likely but it’s gonna be a hard road.

Read it here: If Only

Brown Study by Littlesecret84

Bella's dreams have a way of coming true. But what will she do when the man she dreams of appears in her life as a boy who is less than ideal? Will finding him mean losing her BFF, Jane? Does knowing the future change the present? Rated M for adult stuff.

The Gist:

Brown Study is my most favourite fic. I can't tell you how many times I've read it. I can't literally open up any chapter, start reading, and be totally compelled to read the entire fic again.

The story starts with a young Bella and her premonitions of a man she is head over heels in love with. She see a vision of the love of her life and wonders when he will actually make an appearance. In walks Edward Cullen who is starting high school at Forks and Bella knows that he is special.

What follows is the flirtatious push and pull of two teenagers who are insanely attracted to each. However as soon as they come together, life pulls them apart. Bella is completely heartbroken and stubborn, figuring her life will be off not having Edward in it. The story then skips along Bella's future until she bumps into Edward at a party, immediately knowing that she still loves him but will he come back to her?

Edward and Bella:
What I love about this fic is the heartfelt, passioned stream of consciousness Bella has for Edward. She loves him wholly despite the years apart, the hurt she felt, and the life and the live-in girlfriend that Edward just doesn't seem prepared to leave. She gives herself fully, having faith that he will wise up. 

Bella and Jane:
This is one of the more true to life friendships between two girls that I have ever read. Bella and Jane are childhood bests and live for each other but as they grow up, they also grow apart, with Jane becoming a negative element in Bella's life. The way this relationship plays out is so relatable.

This Is Why You Should Read: 
It's sexy, it's real, it's romantic and it has love pulsing through it.

He says nothing for a while, but holds me tight and squeezes hard, like I would hug my dad after a particularly bad fall, or my mom when I'd find her crying in the kitchen.

"I have to stop," he says, and his lips finally, definitely touch my skin, and there's a gentle trembling where his chin meets my shoulder.

"But… but what if I have to know that you want me?" I ask, not sure where these words are coming from, because they sound strange and needy, and make me feel a little sick.

"What if I have to have this?" I continue.

He moves against me, like other men have before him, and also like he did before any other man, and silently tells me he does want me. He doesn't get it.

"I'm not talking about a natural physical reaction to being close like this… I meant… really want me." My voice breaks on the last few words, and I don't want to cry again.

He squeezes again, sitting up and bringing me with him. He holds me tighter. He opens his eyes and brings his mouth so close to mine. I whisper "tighter" and his forehead meets mine, and his arms are so tight around me, I could break.

"I'll hold you the tightest," he says.

Pretty boys shouldn't be allowed to use pretty words, or convey pretty emotions. It's just not fair, because if I end up with a random guy, say Tom, Dick, or whoever, fifty years from now, what I'll remember is Edward Cullen, holding me like he'll die if he lets me go, almost kissing me and saying things that make my heart soar to heights from which I can never bring it back. So poor, poor men of my future. You now have two Edwards to compete with, and lose against.

Read it here: Brown Study

Let's Try That Again

Wow, um hello there. Wow I'm terrible. Award for best blogger doesn't go to me obviously.

It's been over a year since I last updated and life has definitely dished out some amazing highs and some truly awful lows. But hey, that's life right or at least you'd hope. Who wants to just cruise through your days with nothing challenging you?

Anyways, I'm going to try. I'm going to try and blog again. I'm not making any promises or keeping to any schedule. I'm just going to blog as I like and see how it all goes. I want this to be fun and to be honest easy, so we'll see how we go.

mel xx

Lack of Color by Coldplaywhore

He paints; she inspires. Together they are whole, until one day they are separated, breaking him of his soul. Five years later, she's not his. Can she be again? ExB AU AH M for language and lemons.

This is a great little fic and what might make it an even better proposition to you is that it's complete! God, don't you fucking love those completed fics? I sure do, nothing like knowing you won't have to have your heart in your throat for a whole week waiting for an update.

Bella meets Edward after answering an ad he placed looking for a model. Bella's got a lotta bills she as to pay for and this job provides the perfect opportunity for her to earn good money quickly. 

24 year old meets 19 year old Edward and an instant attraction is felt. It really is a only a matter of time before they succumb to the feelings that crackle between them and to be honest this artist Edward is sultry hot for such a young boy.

"Why did you agree...to pose nude, that is?"

"Well, first of all I haven't been completely nude yet," I mused as Edward gave a small laugh. "And secondly, I need the money. I'm really close to losing my apartment and I refuse to take money from my mother, yet again."

"Okay."

"That's all I get is an okay?"

"Yeah. I mean, you've been a great model today and I've enjoyed spending time with you, getting to know you. I don't really care what brought you here, I'm just glad you are, you know?"

"I know." I smiled sweetly at Edward and he went back to working away, asking me the most random questions about growing up in Forks, and what my favorite movies and bands were.

It was all very casual and easy until he moved away from the canvas and came towards me, bending at the knees in front of me. "I need to move your sash."

"Alright," I squeaked, somewhat unsettled because I knew that the sash for the robe was currently draped between my legs. This would either end badly or... I didn't even want to think of the possibilities.

I watched, taking a nervous gulp, as Edward moved his hand between my legs and reached for the sash to move it to the side. Unfortunately, or fortunately if you were me, his finger slipped between my wet pussy lips before finding their true goal.

Edward froze. His eyes, clouded with both lust and anxiety, as he stared me down. "I am so sorry, Bella," he stammered as he rose from his spot and headed directly into the bathroom, closing the door with a slam behind him.

"Fuck," I groaned as I sat there, my body trembling with apprehension.

However the relationship ends abruptly and the reader is brought to the present through E's POV. Edward's life spiralled out of control when he & Bella broke up and only now is his life getting back on track. However his art was a casualty and he's been unable to connect with anyone since. Unfortunately life gets a lot harder when Bella comes back into his life, the fiancé of his douche bag cousin Peter. Why is she with him? How did they even meet? Why is Bella so different from the vibrant woman he first met? Can Edward get over the resentment and abandonment he feels? Can he stay away from Bella? Well this is all answered but it's not as simple as Edward once thought.

Read it Here: Lack Of Color

Open by SammieLynnsMom

He was right and they were wrong, and that was all he had to stand by. With his career soaring and his marriage sinking, will Edward see they were right all along? What will he learn along the way?

This is a relatively new fic only 5 chapters in and I'm getting on board because I think this could be something great. It certainly has one of the most intriguing banners I've seen in a long while.

Edward has begun seeing a therapist, Dr Banner to work through why he made the disastrous decision to be in an open marriage with his wife Lauren. He loved Lauren and centred his life around her but after several years their relationship has broken down completely with Edward wanting out. 

"Edward," she continued as I huffed. "I get it. It's hard. But it's not fair that I have to sit by and watch you mope. You'll get over it and find someone new. This is why I don't do what you do; you get way too emotionally involved. However, you're home now. It's just me and you here, remember? That was the agreement."

"Lauren, I'm done," I stated so quickly it felt like I was ripping off a Band-Aid. "I can't do this anymore. I'm done."

"Okay," she drew out as her face fell. "Well, if you want to take a break, I guess we could. I'll need to make a few calls, but how long do you want to stop for? I have something Friday, but…"

"No, Lauren, you're not listening. You don't need to make any calls, except to a lawyer. I'm done with you," I explained as calmly and evenly as I could manage.

Edward recounts his recent life to Dr Banner and at times it's hard to read about how in love his was initially was with his wife (strange only because it's Lauren of course) but there is a definite undercurrent of something else at play since we all know it must have been Bella that finally busted up that sham of a marriage.

"Walking away from her was the hardest thing I've ever done," I admitted with my face planted firmly in my hands.

"Why?" She continued to push for more like she always did.

"Because…" I sighed as I looked up, willing myself to form the words. Trying to find, deep down, where I had gone wrong while praying that I could still put the pieces back together. "Because she was home. When I was with her, I felt like the world made sense and it wasn't about being right anymore. I just wanted to be happy…happy with her."

"Do you still think you could be happy with her?" she asked next.

"Yes," I replied without missing a beat. A smile played on my lips as I thought of her brown eyes shining at me the day I took her to the beach. "If only she'd return my phone call."

He could be talking about Lauren but we all know it's Bella. 

We've only just really begun Edward's journey and are yet to meet Bella, I'm hanging out for it and I'm crossing my fingers we don't have to wait to much longer.

Read it Here: Open

Once and Future Lovers by littlesecret84

He told me once that he preferred brunettes, but his fingers were always playing with long, blonde strands. He could never make up his mind... until he did. And now that I'm back I don't think he deserves a second chance.

I love littlesecret84. I love how she writes about love. I love that her expressions of love are so immediate and tactile. I love how her depiction of love is a force that should be embraced even if the circumstance is not perfect. The way she writes about love, is how I feel when in love.

This fic however, requires you to wear your big girl panties because this is no easy relationship and the Edward and Bella in this fic are not perfect examples of human beings. They are real people who have made mistakes and are bound to make more.

Lawyer Bella returns homes to Forks to study for the bar exam. Next door lives her long lost unrequited love Edward and and his wife, Rose. Bella feels she's been cheated out of having her great love because Edward left her to pursue a life with Rose and upon her return she basically sets out to seduce him back.

There is a back history here where Edward and Bella shared a very intense sexual relationship whilst on a holiday, when they were teenagers. However upon their return Bella feels that Edward dropped her like a hot stone to go back to Rose. It's not that simple though because Bella didn't exactly put herself out there to Edward and their lives then forked off into very different directions.

Eventually they do end up crossing that line and embark on a furious affair but...

I want to touch, kiss, lick, feel. Adore. I want to fuck him. I want to talk to him and feel beautiful and interesting, and I want to fall asleep to his voice. And when he asked me if I wanted kids? Just his. And if I had to be a wife, as stupid as it sounds given our situation, he's the only man I'd do that for. But I don't want this. I don't want a married man. A dishonest man. Maybe he's the cutest, and no one will be as warm, or familiar. Maybe he'll be the best I ever had. Best friend, best lover. Just best. But I can do so much better with my life. The magic moment has passed, that I know. 

Bella is selfish and unsure and Edward well he is about the same. He feels inadequate in Bella's life and he's a man that's never really made the hard decisions in his life to get what he wants but that is the beauty of this fic. The flawed characters are real, who just try to feel their way through their lives the best way they can. It's not a story about epiphanies it's a story about making choices.

Fan Fic Vidiot

Tangled up in Blue by TxBirdie

Edward Cullen is looking for inspiration to write THE American novel. Bella Swan is looking for inspiration, any inspiration, to pull her from her doldrums existence. But what they find in each other, neither of them could have expected.

Loving Tangled Up in Blue is no easy ride. When I started reading it in 2010, it was a regular updater then 2011 rolled around and the updates became few and far between. Now in 2012 it has only updated once. But who cares because this is one of my most favourite fics I have ever read and whilst it hurts that TxBirdie doesn't update regularly, when she does it's always amazing. 

This video created by the author TxBirdie is very similar in style to the Under the Apple Tree video I posted and I think you will enjoy not only the video but the fic as well.

Read it Here: Tangled Up in Blue

Twilight Fiction - The Best Man by Alitriona

Next-door neighbors home from college, reunited for two weeks of their summer break. Childhood memories and adult hijinks abound. Will a friendly competition strengthen childhood bonds? Or will it help to forge a new relationship between adults? AH/AU: Rated M

And this is an example of why I can't do fan fics justice. I'm imagining all the footage this person would have to find and review, it's a little mind boggling.

This is a great vid and I know it's great because I want to read the fic. And I know it's a great fan fic vid because even though I've attempted to read the fic a couple of times and have not been hooked, every time I watch this vid... I want to give The Best Man another try!

This fic was loved by many and I would give you the link but it's sadly gone MIA from ff.net so at this point you can just enjoy the vid by Alitriona.

Subscribe to her youtube channel here: Alitriona's Channel